But new psychological research suggests we may be working too hard to avoid something that’s actually … enjoyable.
According to a series of studies published in “Psychological Science,“ people consistently underestimate how engaging and pleasant it can be to simply sit and think without distractions. When participants were asked to wait quietly with no phone, no music and no tasks, they predicted they would be bored. Instead, most reported feeling more interested and satisfied than expected.
“It turns out we’re not nearly as bad at entertaining ourselves as we think,” said Dr. Karen Mitchell, a behavioral psychologist based in Cleveland. “Our brains are wired to wander, reflect and create meaning. We’ve just gotten out of the habit of letting them.”
Why we’re so uncomfortable with stillness
Across six experiments involving 259 participants, researchers found that people regularly chose to avoid waiting —even when the alternative (like checking internet news) wasn’t any more enjoyable. In other words, people worked to avoid an experience they didn’t actually dislike.
That pattern shows up in everyday Ohio life.
“We live in a state where people pride themselves on being busy – between work, kids, side gigs and community commitments,” said Columbus-based therapist Rachel Nguyen. “There’s this unspoken belief that if you’re not doing something, you’re falling behind.”
From early morning commutes on Interstate 75 to packed weekends of youth sports and family obligations, many Ohioans move from one obligation to the next with little mental downtime in between. And when a pause does appear, the reflex is often to reach for a screen.
The brain’s ‘background mode’ is actually productive
Neuroscience helps explain why waiting doesn’t have to feel empty. When the brain isn’t focused on a task, it activates what’s known as the default mode network — a system linked to memory, creativity, future planning and emotional processing.
Another widely cited cognitive study suggests this kind of spontaneous thought plays a key role in identity development and problem-solving.
“This is when people mentally rehearse conversations, work through worries, or have those ‘aha’ moments,” said Dr. Michael Rosen, a professor of cognitive science at a university in Northeast Ohio. “You might think you’re doing nothing, but your brain is doing important work.”
Why we think we’ll be bored (and aren’t)
The research found a consistent mismatch between expectation and reality. Participants expected waiting to be dull or uncomfortable, but reported significantly higher enjoyment once they tried it.
“In therapy, I hear this all the time — I can’t stand being alone with my thoughts,’” Nguyen said. “But when people actually slow down, they’re usually surprised by how quickly their mind settles.”
Part of the issue is cultural. American life — and Midwest work ethic in particular — often treats busy-ness as virtue. Quiet can feel unproductive, and unproductive can feel wrong.
But researchers believe this mindset may be costing us opportunities for mental reset.
A small experiment worth trying
You don’t have to go full digital detox to see benefits. Experts suggest starting with low-pressure moments:
- Leave your phone in the cup holder during a short drive
- Sit in your car for a minute before heading into the store
- Wait in line without scrolling
- Take a walk in your neighborhood without earbuds
“Let your mind go where it wants,” Rosen said. “It might replay a memory, plan dinner or drift somewhere totally random. That’s all part of healthy cognitive processing.”
The bigger picture
Ohio has seen rising conversations around burnout, mental health and work-life balance – especially since the pandemic. Employers, schools and healthcare providers are increasingly emphasizing wellness, yet many people still struggle to slow down.
The irony, experts say, is that rest doesn’t always require time off or a vacation. Sometimes it’s built into the day – we just don’t let it be.
“We’re waiting anyway,” Nguyen said. “At stoplights, in lines, in lobbies. The choice is whether we let those moments breathe or immediately crowd them with noise.”
Content Creator Brooke Bunch may be reached at brooke_bunch@yahoo.com.
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