Though the Nelsons have had support from their own network of support, Christy Nelson said, overall, the support for families after the adoption process is lacking.
“Foster care and adoption have been dear to our hearts for many years, and we’re realizing that after foster care there’s not a lot of support for adoption,” said Christy Nelson, who owns The Benison in downtown Hamilton. “And with kids that have been adopted through foster care, there’s been a lot of past history, a lot of trauma that they have gone through. And the trauma is something that’s going to be ongoing and you work through. And we realize there needs to be support.”
Support doesn’t just help prevent parental burnout, but it strengthens the marriage, the family unit, and the child, “and when you’re all healthy as a family, that’s when kids are going to thrive the most.”
Realizing that was a need was the inspiration for next weekend’s Thrive Adoption Conference next weekend run by the Nelsons, and supported by Butler County Children Services, HOPE-ful Pastures Therapeutic Farm, HOPES Closet and Chick-fil-A.
Thrive is set for March 11, and people can still register for the free conference that will feature several speakers taking on various aspects of adoption and the support system needed. But the day prior, on March 10, there will be a pre-conference banquet that’s $25 per person.
“We want to make a community banquet because we want everyone to understand what trauma is and how it affects everybody,” she said, adding that kids have suffered some type of trauma, which vary in degrees, in order to be adopted. “Thrive is there for them to be inspired, to have a little bit of empathy, to give them tools on how can you address the trauma and work through it because understanding gives you power, and power is what people want.”
The pre-conference and conference, both held at The Benison, 100 S. 3rd St., Hamilton, highlight the importance of asking for help, which Nelson said is “a sign of strength.”
For those coming to the March 11 event, which does require registration though it’s a free event, childcare and food are provided, and there will be several speakers, including former Butler County Probate judge Randy Rogers, who presided over more than 3,000 adoptions in his 26 years on the bench.
In his time as the county’s probate judge, he said he’s seen people whose hearts are as big as the Great Miami River.
“What adoptive parents give is so great,” said Rogers. “The amount of effort, what they pour into these children’s lives is tremendous, and the level of support that they receive in general is just wholly inadequate. They take on jobs that become lifestyles and they’re just kind of amazing.”
Rogers called the Nelsons “a tremendous asset to Butler County. Just great, great people.”
Nelson said education is a piece needed for adoptive parents, which they’ll receive at next weekend’s Thrive conference, but a bigger need is the community surrounding the families.
“When you feel alone, and you’re left out there, and things are hard and you don’t know where to turn, that’s when burnout happens,” said Nelson. “You got to have the education, you’ve got to have the support, and you’ve got to have the people around you who understand what’s going on. It really does take a village.”
HOW TO GO
Register by Friday for the Thrive adoption pre-conference and conference online.
For the pre-conference, visit tinyurl.com/ThrivePreConference
For the conference, visit tinyurl.com/ThriveConference
To learn, email ThriveAdoptionButlerCounty@gmail.com or call 513-449-1001
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