Butler County residents are a thankful lot — and it seems they often are most thankful in times of great adversity and loss.

When the Hamilton JournalNews/Middletown Journal asked readers, “What are you thankful for?” the response often came from unexpected quarters — people who had recently lost loved ones or faced a severe health challenge.

Kate Cleary of New Carlisle is thankful that she can donate a kidney to her grandmother, Shirley King of Middletown. “I am not ready to lose her,” she said.

Many readers are thankful in spite of health challenges that might seem daunting. Alhaji Dumbuya of Fairfield said he is thankful for the risk his sister took for him — donating one of her kidneys “I never wanted anyone in my family to donate,” he said, worried it might lead to health problems for his sister. “It’s a really big deal to get any kind of organ.”

Hamilton resident Shawn Davis spent the entire month of November thinking about what she is thankful for. Like many others, she committed to a Facebook project to post about thankfulness every day.

“At first I was a little apprehensive about doing this because I really do have so much to be thankful for,” she said. “I decided to start from when I was born, that my mom and dad took me to church every day, because that’s a tradition I’ve carried on with my own kids.”

Until recently, it seemed likely that this could have been Shirley King’s last Thanksgiving. The 73-year-old Middletown grandmother has been in acute renal failure for more than two years. The retired nurse and her husband, Bob, spend four hours a day hooking her up to her dialysis machine at home. “I had hoped to spend retirement traveling and fishing,” she lamented. “But I can’t even get into a pontoon boat because I am too fragile and I tip over too easy.”

Her daughter, Shari Ketchum of Middletown, was a match, but was turned donor as a donor for medical reasons. It seemed that King would have to wait for a match that might never come.

Cleary did not think she could be a donor because of a rare condition, known as malignant hyperthermia, which makes her allergic to a long list of inhalant anesthesia. But the 32-year-old mother of three was not ready to lose the grandmother, who helped to raise her after her parents’ divorce. “It’s just not her time,” she said. This, after all, is the grandmother who routinely drives an hour to attend her grandchildren’s concerts and special events, the grandmother who, despite her illness, remains involved with the lives of her eight children, 24 grandchildren and six great-grandchildren. “She has to ride her motorized scooter because it’s hard to breathe,” Cleary said.

On Nov. 15, Cleary got off the phone and called out joyfully, “I’m a match! I’m a match! I’m a match!” Next week, she’ll consult with an anesthesiologist to make sure she can successfully undergo the transplant.

“I am so thankful,” King said. “I’m going to get my life back.”

In their own words

Here is a sampling of what some readers said they are thankful for.

Shawn Davis, Hamilton: Like many other social media users, Shawn Davis of Hamilton committed to a Facebook project to post about thankfulness every day. As much as she thought she was thankful for going into the project, however, turned out to be a drop in the bucket.

“I have realized that I have a lot of different interests and I’ve met a lot of good friends that are into the same things,” she said. “I guess I didn’t really realize how many friends I’ve made through the years until I started writing it down.”

Her posts have included people she’s worked with, people she grew up with, institutions that have helped her get through the rough spots and the children in her life, including those she claim biologically as her own.

“I am so thankful for all the young people in the Hamilton High School Band, those kids works so hard and I am so proud of all of them,” she posted on Day 21. “It’s nice to know when I walk into the band room, they aren’t going to run away from me screaming, they actually talk to me and we can have a conversation.”

So now, the Thanksgiving tradition of starting the meal with a round of thankfulness seems rather daunting.

“If I had to sit at a table now, I’d have to ask how much time do we have,” she said. “We’re going to be here a while.”

Kate Cleary, New Carlisle: “What is it to be thankful? Most people picture a table full of good food, a house full of friends and family and maybe even football. Merriam-Webster describes thankful as being conscious of a benefit received; well-pleased, even glad. The Bible even describes thankful as being content with what you have no matter what your circumstances are. For me, the greatest thing this year that I could be thankful for is time. People are always wishing for more time — more time in the work day, more time to finish a good book, more time to figure out how to spend more time! This year, my time is being donated to someone else who needs it more than I. These years for her (grandmother) are supposed to be her golden years. Years spent enjoying her retirement and her grandchildren.

“The very first thing that came to mind when the coordinator spoke those words, ‘Your cross-match was accepted’ was that my grandma will get more time. Time to enjoy, to love, to cook, to shop, to watch her grandchildrens’ games, to go to their lake house on Cumberland River, just more time to live. I could hear her smiling through the phone when I called her and told her.”

Alhaji Dumbuya, Fairfield: The holiday season has only just begun, but Alhaji Dumbuya has already received a gift: a kidney from his sister. Late last month, Hadiatu Dumbuya donated one of her kidneys to her brother, who needed a new organ because his previous replacement kidney was failing.

“He started feeling really tired, and they started doing all these different tests, and they figured out his kidneys were failing … but he wasn’t sick before that. He was still active, playing soccer, like we all played soccer in high school … it was kind of crazy,” said Hadiatu, who, like her brother, is a Fairfield graduate and played on the school soccer team.

“I didn’t want to get too excited, but she called me crying her eyes out, saying she was a match,” Alhaji said.

“I really just feel blessed that I had the opportunity to do it,” Hadiatu said, reflecting on the procedure at University of Cincinnati Hospital. “I’m just really realizing what I did. I thought it was second nature. I thought, why wouldn’t I donate? And people are (saying) it’s amazing …. I couldn’t imagine any of my siblings needing something and me not doing it for them.”

Alhaji is still recovering, and he still had to undergo tests to make sure his body is accepting the kidney, but all signs are good.

“I’m really not having any complications. From what I understand, with a donated kidney from a family member, you have up to 30 years for that kidney to last,” he said.

Amber Le Frere: Family resilience amid tragedy

“My family is not one that you’d find in some perfect sitcom, who say all the right things and always work everything out in 30 minutes, but I appreciate them because they’ve been there with me through a great deal of difficult times,” the Bellbrook woman said. “We have managed to grow stronger through a lot of unusually stressful and tragic events; my mother was disabled in a serious car accident when I was just 16. In 2002, my mother committed suicide and my brother was murdered. Both my grandmother and uncle died very suddenly in 2010.”

And this year, Le Frere’s sister, Dawn, a Mason resident, died after her long battle with breast cancer.

“Dawn was diagnosed with stage 3 breast cancer in 2009. She had been unable to conceive for seven years and then the doctors told her she had gone into early menopause because of the chemo and radiation treatments. The following summer, when she was in remission, she started having weird symptoms and worried the cancer had returned. During an ultrasound of her stomach and digestive system, they discovered she was SEVEN months pregnant! Jackson was born in 2010 and she then had another miracle baby, Luke, 11 months later.

“In 2011 the cancer returned at stage 4 and she was given 6 months to live. It would be easy to be mad at the world or God when considering the difficulties we as a family have endured, but because my family has been through more than anyone else I know, I think we have a very different perspective on life. We do not take each other for granted and we enjoy every day we have together. This year, we are missing my sister Dawn. We are hugging each other a little tighter, and remembering the amazing person she was, sad that she left us, but thankful for who she was, and how much she blessed this family.”

Staff Writer Eric Robinette contributed to this story.