Journal-News.com

Some of the most common questions children ask after a divorce are about what will happen to them, said Fran Sweeney, a leader in a children's support group, Divorce Care 4 Kids.

The nondenominational church-based group targets children ages 5-12 and takes a Christian approach to healing.

It is just as important for the children to heal as much as it is for the adults, she said.

"It's much scarier for the kids than it is for adults," Sweeney said. "All the fears and all the issues are magnified in the children's minds. Kids are very dependent and have very little control and say."

To help children, she said, parents must also help themselves. At Royal Redeemer Lutheran Church in Liberty Twp., families often attend both the 13-week adult and children support groups.

Sweeney said children are encouraged to share feelings in a safe place. They play games, watch a video and make crafts.

And when the "why?" question comes up, Sweeney said she tells them about God's love and how it isn't always possible to understand the big picture right now.

Jen Russell, school counselor at Lakota's Creekside Early Childhood Center, said she formed a school support group after getting many requests from parents.

"The parents didn't know how to address it and what to tell and not to tell," she said.

So, Russel founded the group "Splits," and started signing children up for eight-week sessions.

In her program, students talk about feelings, having two homes, blended families, supporting each other and talking to their parents. She uses puppets, literature, games and role playing.

"The word traveled and it ended up being a wonderful, wonderful thing," Russell said.

As she talks to children about divorce, she said they make comments and draw connections that it isn't their fault and they are not alone.

"It's an outlet for them to say things they want to say," Russel said. "They love Mom and Dad so much and they don't want to say something to Mom in case it hurts Dad. They are very much at that approval stage."

For more information on support groups, contact a school counselor of visit www.DC4K.org or call

Contact this reporter at (513) 755-5067 or lhilty@coxohio.com.