The Adobe Flash Player is required to view this multimedia interactive. Get it here.

Facebook netiquette: the dos and don’ts of social networking on the Internet

Clark Howard: Valentine’s saving tips anyone would love
8:50 a.m.
Musical to feature heart, drama of Clooney’s life
2/11/12
Protecting your child from sexual abuse
2/11/12
‘Old person’ gets hope from young woman
2/11/12
5 ways to get party-ready for the Oscars
2/11/12
> More lifestyle headlines

By Amelia Robinson, Staff Writer Updated 12:08 PM Friday, May 1, 2009

Rachel L. Randolph was getting poked and for the life of her, she didn’t know why or what to do about it.

Responding properly to said poking wasn’t the only thing that baffled the 40-year-old Dayton resident during her first few attempts at navigating Facebook.com.

“All these people were giving gifts,” she said. “I didn’t know what they (the gifts) were and I didn’t know how to delete them.

“It’s just so much pressure to join this group and to take this test. What kind of dog are you? What kind of cat are you? What color is your heart. What’s your princess name? What’s your mafia name? They should start having Facebook support groups or Facebook anonymous,’” she said.

It took Randolph awhile, but she learned an important lesson when it comes to social network etiquette — it is perfectly acceptable to ignore a request and you don’t have to poke anyone back. (See definitions.)

Still Randolph feels for newbies to social networking sites like Facebook, Myspace, LinkedIn, Twitter and Friend Finder.

Kim Gregson, an social networking expert and assistant professor of communications at Ithaca College, said Internet mumbo-jumbo is not a first language to many of those joining the sites.

Facebook for instance says its fastest growing demographic is age 35 and older. The fastest growing segment of users is women older than age 55, according to Inside Facebook, which tracks Facebook’s growth.

On the surface, Gregson said, social networking seems to lessen the human experience. But the opposite is true, she said.

“These things help us regain the human connection that we all want,” she said. “It is trying to make social connections in a world that is moving way too fast for people.”

Moreover, she said, chaos doesn’t rule in the world of social networking. There is etiquette and there are rules. Here are a few general rules:

You don’t have to follow everyone

Gregson said you don’t have to read everyone’s tweets on Twitter.

“I don’t think there’s a strong expectation that you follow everyone back (on Twitter),” Gregson said. “It’s a bonus if you do.”

De-friend at will

Social networking friendships can be fleeting, Gregson said.

“I don’t think (most) people take it personally if you de-friend them,” she said. “There are a hundred reasons people might be pruning their network.”

Still, Gregson cautioned against de-friending people you are close to offline.

Apps not always applicable

Think of applications invitations as chain e-mails and ignore the ones that don’t interested you.

“The app(lication)s are set up to be spammy,” she said. “People expect you to ignore most of them.”

In that same respect, Gregson said users shouldn’t inundate friends with gifts and invitation after invitation. That’s a good way to end up de-friended, she said.

Keep them separate

Gregson that it is perfectly OK to have a professional social networking page and another one that is just for close personal friends.

“You almost need two accounts,” she said.

Sometimes friends aren’t friends

If everyone at your company is friends on a social networking site, you may be professionally obligated to befriend an unsavory person.

“You have to be much more careful of what you post and share,” she said.

Share this article