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Home > Blogs > Women's Life > Archives > 2011 > July > 29
Friday, July 29, 2011
Wine, chocolates and roses: Romantic or cliche?
Another blog I follow has been debating this week about the romantic merits of some classic gestures like being serenaded, gifts of chocolate and flowers, candles and rose petals in the boudoir, and taking baths together. Some women love these displays of affection, while for others, the cheesy factor is just too much.
Obviously, romance is a word with many individualized definitions, and what is romantic for some is a buzzkill for others. In addition to the those mentioned above, I came up with a few more examples that tend to draw strong opinions from women:
- Public displays of affection
- Public marriage proposals
- Holding the door open for you, opening the car door for you, or pulling out your chair
- Playing footsie or holding hands at the table
- Ordering your food for you
- Surprising you with anything - a date, a gift, a night without the kids
- Expensive gifts, like diamonds
- Frequent compliments
- Paying for your date
- Buying you lingerie
- Creating something just for you - a poem, a song, a painting or sculpture, etc.
- Getting a tattoo of your name or face
What are some of the things from that list that you consider romantic? Which ones make you shudder? I know some women who hate being surprised, and others who would be offended if their date ordered food for them.
My husband proposed to me in public in the middle of Chicago, but I don’t think a lot of other people really noticed it happening, so I was spared the pressure of a stadium or theater full of people waiting for my answer - which I doubt I would have liked. But I also remember the last day of school in 6th grade when my English teacher’s boyfriend proposed to her over the school intercom during the afternoon announcements, which I found (and still find) charming, endearing and romantic.
Roses don’t do much for me, but I was touched when my husband brought home a bouquet of painted daisies when I was having a bad week. Being a writer myself, I would be swayed by a well-written poem (extra points if it’s a sonnet).
Sometimes, though, it takes just a few words to make a heart melt. Last week, after doing something that sent me into a hysterical laughing fit, he said, “I like making you laugh.” Such a mundane sentence, but it definitely struck a chord. He’s not a very verbal person, in that he rarely puts words to his affection (beyond saying “I love you” and giving me a ton of cute pet names), so to say something like that was meaningful just because it was unexpected and uncharacteristic of him.
What does your spouse/significant other do that makes you feel loved? Or, if no such person exists in your life at the moment, what could a potential partner do to win you over?
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