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Home > Blogs > Sir Critic on Cinema > Archives > 2008 > January > 03 > Entry
No! No!! Get me AWAY from these 2008 movies!
Yesterday we looked at the promising coming attractions of 2008. Today we look at the dark side of the movies for the new year - the titles that could cause potential brain damage - or revulsion at the very least.
In the Name of the King: A Dungeon Siege Tale: How on earth does the ragingly inept director Uwe Boll continue to get money for his movies? Heck, at least Ed Wood was sincerely, cheerfully incompetent. And to top it all off, Boll roped Leelee Sobieski into the cast. And to think she had a promising career … (Jan. 11)
Meet the Spartans: First Date Movie, then Epic Movie, now this. Strike Three! Yeeerrrr out! No, really, please - stop. This FAQ at the IMDB says it all. (Jan. 25)
Rambo: OK, Sly, Rocky Balboa exceeded most people’s expectations, including mine. But is this trip really necessary? (Jan. 25)
Big Stan: A con man hires a martial arts guru to transform him into a martial arts expert who can fight off inmates. But that’s not the scary part. Rob Schneider directs. I say again - Rob Schneider directs. (April 27)
You Don’t Mess with the Zohan: So Judd Apatow co-wrote this movie with Adam Sandler, about a Mossad agent fakes his death so he can re-emerge in New York City as a hair stylist. Election and Sideways writers Alexander Payne and Jim Taylor had a hand in I Now Pronounce You Chuck and Larry, and that didn’t stop that movie from being typical Sandler. meaning comedy for perpetual 12-year-olds. (June 6)
Death Race: I’m not as critical of Paul W.S. Anderson as most of the geek crowd, but I do have one question. Joan Allen is in the cast? JOAN ALLEN? Anderson and Boll must share the same casting agent/hypnotist. (Sept. 26)
Madagascar: The Crate Escape: I wasn’t a great fan of Madagascar, and I know it made a lot of money, but honestly, did anyone really love the first movie enough to want more? Maybe if they had made a movie about the penguins, the only decent part of the first film, they might have something. (Nov. 7)
What films from this year are you dreading?
Permalink | Comments (3) | Categories: Coming Attractions
Comments
By WSUstudent
January 12, 2008 1:00 AM | Link to this
I saw the trailer for “Meet the Spartans” and nearly vomited. I am completely flabbergasted that movies like that, “Epic Movie,” and others of the same quality (or lack thereof) are still bringing in viewers. Aren’t we tired of this crap yet? I know I am.By SRCputt
January 3, 2008 3:26 PM | Link to this
Eric, I am surprised you din’t mention “Semi-Pro”, the latest starring effort of Will Farrell.By SRCputt
January 3, 2008 3:12 PM | Link to this
Actually, “Meet The Spartans” is strike five. This duo also wrote “Spy Hard” and the original treatment for “Scary Movie”.