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Home > Blogs > Big C's NFL Blitz > Archives > 2009 > July > 12 > Entry
McNair, a playa in the game
On Saturday, thousands attended the funeral of former NFL star quarterback Steve McNair. By now we have read the reports and stories of what took place in his condo early in the morning on July 4th. It was tragic, senseless and very sad for many reasons.
In football the rules are clear. The field is marked, your teammates are obvious, and jerseys are numbered. There is a playbook, a host of coaches and several referees to penalize players when the rules have been broken.
In the dating field, things are not so black and white. It is not always obvious who the real players are and who can handle playing the game mentally.
McNair knew the rules. He had been around for 36 years and knew how to play. And up until he met Sahel “Jenny” Kazemi, he had encountered women who knew how to play as well. Expect no commitment and you will never be disappointed.
Unfortunately, Kazemi wanted commitment and had designs on other things such as fame and fortune.
Kazemi was 16 years younger and fairly new to this sort of relationship. She thought that she was ready to play the game, but wasn’t quite mature enough for the big league. According to her family, she thought that McNair was going to divorce his wife so he could marry her. The truth is that no divorce papers existed.
The rumor is that McNair had actually begun dating another woman while he was still dating Sahel. Perhaps in Sahel’s naiveté, she assumed that McNair only cheated on his wife with her.
Rule #1: If he is cheating on his wife, he will cheat on you, too.
Rule #2: In relationships, your teammate sometimes can become your opposition.
Relationships are tricky even under the most “normal” circumstances. Steve finally played with someone who couldn’t handle the game.
According to reports that are circulating around the web, this was not the only mistress McNair ever had. Apparently, he dated a stripper from a club he owned and dated her for six years. Rumors are that she loved money, NFL players and McNair. She also just wanted to have fun. It sounds to me that she could handle playing the game and was an All-Pro.
It is easy to get sucked into superficialities. Whether it be beauty, money, status, or youth. We are all human and we all have lapses in judgment at some point in our lives. This situation prompts me to share a tidbit of my life. Something I never do.
I lost someone very dear to me because I got caught up in what I like to call flash. Thankfully, I got wise and recognized that all flash does is temporarily blind you from the true situation at hand.
McNair got used to the flash and now two lives are cut short over what? The thrill of the chase?
Luckily, I learned from my mistake and got out of the game before something detrimental occurred to me. Bottom line, nothing good comes out of being dishonest.
Let this be an entire cheerleading squad waving red flags in all our faces. Be careful! Hell just might turn out to be the person you are sharing your bed with.
My condolences to Steve McNair’s family, friends and fans.
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By Me
July 13, 2009 8:51 AM | Link to this
When your messin with a married man you surely can’t believe that he will ever leave his wife for you.. Especially if they have kids together and he got money b/c he has too much to lose. Like you said she just wasn’t ready for the “GAME”.. If a man or woman is going to take that chance to jepordize one of the most sacred unions by cheating “with you” best believe they have no intrest on caring about your feelings and making it work. It’s more like Hit it, split it, quit it, and forget it. That is the mentality for the “GAME” if you can’t play and you let your feelings get involved you can expect the worst to happen which in this case it did and unfortantly for both families it was tragic.
By Becca
July 13, 2009 9:37 AM | Link to this
I share your pain Carlos. Living with the guilt of knowing that you hurt someone you love is brutal, but much better than death. Although at times I wish I were dead, I learned to cope with my lapse in judgment. I wish things could have turned out differently for Steve and Sahel.
By Joe
July 13, 2009 11:18 AM | Link to this
Well said. Hopefully others will learn from this before it’s too late.
By Don
July 13, 2009 11:51 AM | Link to this
I feel your pain Big C. I had my own lapse in judgement and I am not sure I will ever forgive myself. Nothing physical ever happened BUT the fact that anything happened bothers me every single day.
By Ken
July 13, 2009 12:41 PM | Link to this
Whoa, it’s not so easy as that. The reports say that she did not start ‘dating’ McNair until he told her he was getting a divorce. I do not think it has been established she thought that McNair was getting a divorce for the purpose of being with her. Also, she was young, but I wonder how naive she really was.
By stupid is stupid does
July 13, 2009 2:25 PM | Link to this
he was a hero on the football field. off the field another story.The same could be said for 90% of sports stars and celebrities. it makes you appreciate the real heroes like our grandparents, parents, former coaches, teachers, pastors, and good friends.WE REAP WHAT WE SOW and we should start now becoming the heroes that we need to be to our children and our community.
By Lauren
July 13, 2009 4:43 PM | Link to this
Very insightful piece, Carlos! However, I do believe that most men tend to gravitate towards the physical appearance of a women rather than intellectually. These young pretty GIRLS may look like women but are far from it mentally. Unfortunately for Steve he learned that the hard way. He was dealing with a child and loose cannon. This is a sad story no matter how you look at it. Guys, don’t be misled by what is easy to obtain. That can get you dead. Ladies, have some self respect and make the man earn the treasure. Don’t give into the compliments, gifts, and wining and dining. Make him put in some real work. Simply put, don’t be some man’s docking station.